Living Dreams First

I was reading a couple articles in my daily devotional, Journey, and one of them (A Gentle Heart) was about a lady who, like many, struggled to get along with her daughters. This lady had dealt with years of resentment for missing many of life experiences her friends had been able to enjoy, like college life.


It really made me think of where I am. I've wondered so many times, including today, if I am wrong to want a husband since I am very blessed, have a best friend who very much so lives up to the title, and my financial situation allows me to go to school without having to work and enjoy my summer vacation! I'm 36 years old, and only a few years ago did I even think of giving college the time of day. However, I served in the United States Air Force for 6 years and, without the horror of combat, saw parts of the world that the tourists usually miss. I also had the opportunity to take acting classes at John Casablancas and Excel Model and Talent. So as to help a friend scratch off a place from her "bucket list" I took the time to visit Graceland. When I moved back to my home state, I went skydiving for the first time with some fellow college students and discovered a new vision shortly afterward. I am now hoping to study abroad in Australia!


What it comes down to is that although I really want a hand to hold at the end of the day, now if I do settle down and raise a family, I don't think I'll feel like I've missed something. I won't feel like I've missed out on life. Hopefully, if when I have my own children or even step or adopted children, I'll make for a better mother for it because I'll better be able to empathize with their hopes and dreams. I'll watch his football playing or her cheerleading as a roaring fan. I'll know what it's like to dream... and to have that dream come true.

Reflections on Expressive Drawing/Painting

Came across a family's blog and saw a picture of writing on someone's hand: "If you are busy being creative, you aren't busy being destructive" and there were a few paintings. It reminds me that we don't have to be good at drawing or painting to express our hearts that way. We can just draw or paint, and not only do we give ourselves a chance to come to terms with our own feelings, good or bad, we may also be blessing, even comforting, someone else who may have needed to see it. Words can tear down or heal, and a picture's worth a thousand "healing" words. I have a few different pictures in my mind, but only one do I feel like I can really draw with a chance of not looking like a preschooler doodling. I guess it doesn't matter. Still, I wish I had the drawing skills to truly express my heart the way I've expressed it in poetry. Maybe I just need to take the time to do whatever I can. First let's see if I can do something about changing my internal clock so I won't sleep the mornings away.

Everything But the Girl "Missing"

As I watched the music video on YouTube...Oh, this sure calls out a certain gentleman's name. I'm still haunted by the memory of an exchange student from Australia I had as a classmate in Acting Study 1. The beginning of Acting Study 2, when he was no longer there, I sat in his usual seat just to ease the aching. That was over a year ago when I went to that very same classroom feeling like something was... Missing!